Frugal Friday

This week has not gone so well on the budgeting front, but I will be back on the wagon next week. I had a strange craving for hotdogs all week which is so weird because I don’t eat that sort of food normally. I fought the urge to eat ground up butt and ears (or what ever hotdogs are made of) and got Malaysian takeaways – it’s amazing how much better I felt after the Nasi Lemak! Now I’m curious now to know what I was deficient in that anchovies, egg and lamb curry could satisfy me.

I took a trip out to the outlet mall nearby on Wednesday to have a look around and get an idea of prices. I really need some new running shoes as I’m getting sore calves and having problems with the soles of my feet and I’m pretty sure it’s because the ones I have do not have enough arch support, but I also can’t afford to spend $250 on a specially fitted pair from a sports shoe shop (or should I just make myself afford it?) but I found some New Balance shoes there in the factory shop for around $80 so I think I might get a pair and see how they go.  Otherwise, I really need to get a date for coming to the US sorted so I can buy a pair there! Though the exchange rate is crap (51c to a US dollar) so I won’t be shopping as much as last time.  I didn’t buy anything at the outlet store this time, but I will go back – are you proud of me for not impulse buying?

That leads me to my other tip for the day – I’m going to go fill up my tank today with petrol as I heard on the radio that there might be another prices rise due to the drop in the kiwi dollar overnight, petrol has gone up almost 30c a litre since Christmas due to the South Pacific Peso (oops I mean kiwi dollar) dropping in value and therefore increasing the cost to buy fuel (well that’s what the oil giants tell us). I’m obviously going to be playing “fill up for a price rise” game again, oh the fun.

We’re also having quite a few bbq’s in our flat at the moment which is actually pretty good for saving money as well.  My flatmate does a great bbq and his guy friends are excellent cooks – and I only have to walk downstairs to socialise which works really well for me!

My other tip for budgeting is not to have six kids. Seriously. I know this is a random tangent, but let me explain myself. I volunteered to cook a meal once a fortnight for a family from church who have a 16 year old son with Leukemia and then I found out that they have five other kids (after I went to buy food…. but that’s another story). I’m totally in awe of them – imagine the food bills, the laundry! They’ve had three years of this now and lost their house as a result of all the time they have had to spend at hospital and not building their business, I really just can’t imagine how they are surviving.  But I’m also going to go back and drop some more food off to them as I’m sure that’s probably one of their huge costs with a family that large. I’m in awe of people who make the commitment to have large families, but it made me realise that you shouldn’t do it unless you’re a really strong person as if anything goes wrong it’s going to be all that much harder to survive. Probably since I’m single at 31 this won’t be something I’ll ever have to worry about though.

That’s me for the week! Not such a good week on the budget front but I should have my head above water again soon.

I like this…

I think I can empathise. Maybe that’s why I’m not married!

Frugal Friday

After a comment to my flatmate the other day that all of a sudden it’s trendy to be careful with money I thought it would be fun to talk about some of the things I am doing to manage my cash better. I know a lot of us thirty and twenty-somethings have not been all that wonderful with managing our money and the last seven or eight years have been pretty prosperous in a lot of the world so we’ve had an irresponsible spend now, worry later attitude. In NZ this isn’t helped by the fact that our government all of a sudden lumbered us with paying for our education (when it had been pratically free until the 90s) and then told us that getting massively in debt would be an investment in our future… I’m still not sure about the logic in that! But with property at an almost unaffordable rate, grocery prices increasing and petrol still actually a bit expensive here I know I need to be a more careful spender.  Hopefully this will be the first in a series of budgetting tips as this year I get serious about clearing my debt and living more deliberately. Though my memory isn’t what it used to be so please excuse me if I forget it’s Friday once in a while!

January has gone extremely well for me in terms of my budget – I managed to save enough money to buy a new car and only used a few hundred dollars of my insurance payout towards it as I saved the rest! I’m very pleased with myself as I am on less income than I used to be and I’m managing to live on it so far pretty well. I’m so not an expert at budgetting like so many bloggers are, who are trying to feed a family and live on the smell of an oily rag and I’m totally in awe of those people… but they are things So, what is working for me so far?

• not buying drinks out – I have been freezing and chilling old bottles of water as I get really bad headaches in the heat as a result of my brain injury. Having cold drinks always on hand has proved to be a great idea and am saving so much money.
• resisting the urge to buy newspapers and magazines. Magazines are expensive in NZ (upwards of $6 generally) and I used to often buy a few a month. As I spend a bit of time in waiting rooms and stuff I tend to end up reading a lot of the mags eventually anyway. Also because of my concentration issues I can go back to old ones and not remember anything that I read in them anyway.
• If I really, really need a magazine fix and want to do something fun I go to Borders at my local mall and sit down in Gloria Jeans (like Starbucks… but I don’t drink coffee anymore so I’m not so fussy about being in a place like that) and grab a stack of international magazines that cost like $17 airfreighted and read for an hour over a chai or something.
• Biking for small trips (now I have a car) saves so much petrol and is good for you!
• Cooking from scratch and eating at home mostly. I have really improved my cooking skills since I have been of work as I’ve had the time to experiment with gluten free cooking. Making my own bread, muffins and muesli (granola) bars lately has been saving me so much money. Gluten free bread is about $7 a loaf sometimes, but I think I can make something homemade for a fraction of the cost, even though the ingredients I cook with cost a bit more I figured out that a whole batch of banana muffins for example probably costs about the same as buying just one out in a cafe. And I know what’s gone into it.
• I planted lettuce, spinach and other greens back in October and it’s proven to be a very good move. I can pick greens as I need them and they practically look after themselves. Also I don’t throw manky, wilted greens away anymore either. If you live somewhere you can grow a garden you should do it! I need to get back to the garden store and get my autumn and winter veges sorted out now!
• One of my biggest money saving tips at the moment is not working though (which isn’t really practical or common sense) as I don’t have any desire to buy expensive clothes. I live in pretty casual stuff and have a whole wardrobe of clothes and tons of shoes that I don’t really wear now so when I walk past clothing stores I can easily resist temptation. I think this may be a miracle, but I’m glad for it!
• Not eating too much meat. Now, NZ is probably fairly cheap for meat I’d imagine as we produce so much beef and lamb in particular, but it is still cheaper and healthier for me to limit my consumption. I find then I can afford better quality food in general. Soaking your own beans really doesn’t take much effort and can really bulk up a meal, for example and it’s really quick and easy to pull them out of the freezer later when you need them. I always cook more than I need, so then I have food ready to use later and it only take fractionally longer to cook them than open a tin.

That’s all for this week… if you have any great tips feel free to share them! And please remember that I am a single women living in a city – some of what works for me probably seems really silly to a mum of five and vice versa as buying everything in bulk for example would just be a waste of money if I couldn’t eat it.

Is turning into your parents a good thing?

Do you ever wonder how much your parent’s relationship has or will affect yours? Many people in my generation come from divorced families so I know that makes them shy away from committing too quickly, but what about those of us who have parents that are still married? I have been pondering this lately as I think about the family ‘rules’ that I grew up with and realise some of them may not be so normal, but also see my parents making the most of a difficult situation since my father’s accident.

Firstly, I know that they are fairly non-confrontational so things can simmer away under the surface and snipey comments be exchanged but usually I don’t think they purposely sit down and talk about things that much. At least I don’t remember it from when I was a child and I have witnessed enough complaining about the other party to believe it. My father often (pre and post accident) complains about my mother’s spending for example, but I’ve gotten to the point of just saying to him that he’s spoiling her and he should sit down and they should both set a budget (my mother is probably going to be the main income earner soon though so this may be redundant, I suspect she’s more frugal with her own money than other people’s). I sort of can’t believe that after forty years together they haven’t figured this out yet.

I know I have issues with confrontation – maybe it’s because Kiwi’s just aren’t that ‘out there’ as a rule or maybe it’s the background I come from and having a mother that swung to hysterical screaming very quickly can make you shy away from speaking your mind, funnily enough. I don’t think I do too badly if I really think something is important to bring up though, but I know I need to be aware of it. Luckily, Americans are very confrontational (compared to us British colonies) so I’m learning to deal with it better and not take everything to heart completely.

One great thing I think I have learnt from my parents, though it is sort of gross and makes me what to curl up in a ball and rock, is that I know they had an active sex life up until the time of the accident. As a child, my brother and I knew to not disturb them if they were having a nap on a Sunday afternoon (apparently they were sometimes actually sleeping according to my mother) and my sister unfortunately caught the live show more than once (I’m surprised she didn’t poke her eyes out with hot pokers after that) so I grew up aware that it was a normal and natural part of marriage. I think too many women put their children first after they are born and neglect their husbands or simply don’t understand the importance men place on sex (said like a single woman I know) but it’s something I’m determined to always be aware of and try to keep things fun and interesting. Easier said than done when you have small children I’m sure.

One thing I would want to do better is to be more physically open than my mum and dad. I have never actually seen them kiss, which is probably very strange to those of you with parents who were more open. Touch is my secondary love language so I don’t think this will be an issue for me, but I think it’s important for kids to see their parents being affectionate…. not too much though as I’ve heard some funny stories of kids walking in on things that they just really shouldn’t have seen from my friends with pre-schoolers.  Ew.

I’m also still getting my head around the submitting to your husband thing and what that means in a modern world. I used to have an idea that it meant switching your brain off and doing whatever they said, but somehow I think any guy that married me would be pretty surprised if I started acting like that (all of a sudden) and wonder where his wife went. In saying that, I have also observed the wisdom in shutting up every so often, praying and respecting and honouring your husband and treating them like a man. It may not be PC these days, but I think we girls like being treated like women so why not the reverse? How this all works in practise though I’m yet to learn!

Because my family was ever so slightly dysfunctional when I was younger I am so aware of the danger of continuing those unhealthy patterns in the future, but you know I think I am lucky to have parents who are still married. They at least have taught me that marriage is hard work, that it may not be all sweetness and light and candle-lit dinners and you can stick that out to the point where you’re happy in your fifties to go for a walk on the beach and collect shells together (my parents do this and they come back feeling slightly embarrassed and wonder what happened to the cool couple from the 1970s they used to be) and enjoy the companionship. I think I want more and don’t think relationships these days would survive without a lot of effort, but it’s still nice to have the example.

Random Ponderings

Not much is happening for me at the moment, or I’m just not feeling that inspired when I sit down at my laptop to share anything creative.

I’ve been listening to some great teaching on my mp3 when I’m out exercising lately and enjoying thinking about teaching – been listening to teaching on healing and destiny from Hillsong London’s website lately. It’s funny, I was thinking how great things are set up there now and how it’s a seriously great church for twenty-something and thirty-somethings and I’d love to have an environment like that here with all the great resource etc. And then I remembered that I was there seven years ago now and it was where I started tithing properly and how I have sowed seeds that have in a small way allowed them to do some of the great things they do.  I’m not saying this to blow my own trumpet, but to remind myself to be faithful with giving as you just don’t know what you’re helping to set up and who it will impact. It really is amazing to see how much it has changed since I was there and I’m glad I’ve been a very small part of it.

I have been enjoying getting out in my car and it certainly makes life soooooo much easier. Petrol is up about 15 cents though this month so I think I might be responsible for the price rise. I’m sorry, if I sell my car I think I can promise it will then go down in price, but I just got sick of the bus so I don’t think I can.

I’ve been plodding away on the business stuff and it’s been really good for my brain so I’m glad I’m doing it. Had a bit of a break through today in a contact I had from Wellington who works in the Government Pharmaceutical funding agency and he’s pointed me in a very helpful direction. I’m now trying to figure out if my brain is ready for RFPs and the massive undertaking that would be involved with supplying government. It looks like I might need to go to Wellington and get a better understanding of the tender process in person as well, so I’m a bit scared as my memory can be a bit shady at times now, I’m wondering if they would let me take a recorder in? I might just have to own up to J about some of my concentration issues as I don’t think he’s totally realised.

Another issue that is plaguing me is if I should be mixing my personal life and business. I think at this stage I’m just happy I’m working my brain and building my confidence for work when (I’m still waiting) I get approved for full time work and some of the stuff I’ve been looking at is pretty complex so my head swims a bit. But I’m not sure long term if it’s wise yet.

On another positive note, I’m feeling really good. My OT made me (I wasn’t happy) try to stop having afternoon sleeps and I reluctantly gave it a go. Actually she was pretty wise, I don’t need them anymore really. I do get a bit fuzzy in the middle of the day, but just taking a break and doing something else seems to work. Tomorrow I’m going to go do Body Balance at the gym at 1pm and see if that is a good time of day to do it, I really need to stretch out my muscles anyway.

I’m going to go to bed now as I want to get up early and watch some of the happenings in the States. I’m very excited about it and it hit me today seeing Michelle Obama especially standing there on TV how much things have changed. I hope that it really is a signal of a new era in the US, I can’t quite believe I am seeing it happen so soon in my life actually.

Decreasing waistline, exercise and a new car!

Someone told me today that I’ve lost weight! I am very happy about this, especially considering I have hardly budged on the scales but I was thinking I was looking a bit less flabby. This is a good thing because I’ve been biking tons, swimming and even doing a teeny bit of running (miniscule bit of running really) and also it’s handy because I have made a bit of a bet with a certain boy that I will lose more weight than he will before we see each other again. We’re both carrying a bit of extra luggage  that we really need to get rid of and I have to say that he somehow really knew how to push my buttons by suggestng this challenge, as every time I go to reach for some dark chocolate or get tempted by sugar I think of him winning and I just don’t like it.

I haven’t decided on a wager yet though and given the fact that he used to be an elite level athlete, I’m not sure I want to suggest something that is going to be too harsh on me if I lose. I think I might just be happy with the satisfaction of fitting into some of my favourite clothes again and looking and feeling better… but that’s probably just boring thinking.

I also picked up my new car today – which I saved hard for and didn’t actually really need to touch the insurance money I got from my other car. It’s black and has a spoiler and even though it’s old I think it will do the trick. I am going to be able to get out to beaches and go to the gym easily and do all sorts of exciting stuff. Oh and best of all – I put $40 of petrol in it today and it filled it up to 3/4 of a tank! Amazing stuff and I can’t wait to see how long that lasts me for. Last time I owned a car $40 would probably have barely made it to 1/4 of a tank in my old car.

I promise to keep using my bike though and not become a totally lazy car owner again. Truly! I’m getting used to kamikaze missions on the roads around here now anyway and trying to curb my potty mouth when losers cut me off and try to knock me off my bike.

Putting my money where my mouth is…

As a follow up to my post earlier this week about faith and works, I have volunteered for a team in my church that will be available to cook, clean etc for people who need help. I’m very pleased and excited to be able to help out, especially while I have the time. Also, it’s interesting to note that the person in charge of organising it told me that about two years ago she tried to pull together people and it didn’t work, but this time round she’s had a really good response. Interesting. I wonder what’s changed?

99 things

*** the italics and bold didn’t copy and paste from Word very well and I’m going to use my brain injury as an excuse not to go through and redo it all, hope it still makes sense***

The 99 Things Meme! Things you’ve already done: bold

Things you want to do: italicize

Things you haven’t done and don’t want to: leave in plain font

I got this from Jenny’s blog after she commented on Dawn’s blog delurking day…. it seemed sort of fun!

1. Started your own blog. Obviously, yes!

2. Slept under the stars. At fourth form camp on the last night (we were like 14 and the whole class went away for a week and camped on Maori owned land (thanks to one of our teacher we could use it) was pretty rough and I think that’s when I started swearing. There was a 6 hour hike that became 12 hours and romances that bloomed from what I remember (my friend knocked teeth while kissing in the dark so we all knew). Sleeping under the stars was beautiful, but damp as I remember.

3. Played in a band. If by band this means a Symphonic Band, yes. An actual cool garage type band no. I used to play Clarinet in a regional representative band (all the best musicians from our province) and got to get out of my tiny little town to a city every Friday night. On the positive side I travelled with the band overseas and around NZ, made some life-long friends and got my first boyfriend through it. And I don’t think bands here are as geeky as in the States… well maybe. Can I play now…. nope….. I seem to have wiped those eight years of practicing and lessons and exams from my mind completely.

4. Visited Hawaii. Only the airport when I was seven. And I only really remember that mum had to buy my little brother a new t-shirt as he puked all over his one on the way from LA.

5. Watched a meteor shower. No, how and when can I do this I wonder

6. Given more than you can afford to charity. I think I can say yes to this… I gave a lot away in my old church and I’m not sure my budgeting skills were up to it really. 7. Been to Disneyland/World. Both Disneyland when I was 7 – we won a trip all the way from NZ! Was pretty cool and we were the envy of every kid (and adult) in town. Disney World – yep last year with my boy, it was fun but I’d like to go back with someone who’s more of a kid and doesn’t complain that everything is “gay” in the Magic Kingdom.

8. Climbed a mountain. Yep, small mountains but mountains none the less. I actually used to live half way up Mt Victoria in Wellington so every day on the way home I technically walked part way up one. I was also about 10 kgs lighter then.

9. Held a praying mantis. I’m sure I did as a kid 10. Sang a solo. Thank the good Lord I’ve never done this in public, I really can’t sing very well at all (despite the aforementioned 8 years of music lessons).

11. Bungee jumped. Despite being from NZ where Bungee was invented I would never do this. After getting whiplash this year I am even less likely to consider it in case anything went wrong.

12. Visited Paris. No, still not sure why I never caught the Eurostar over there when I lived in London.

13. Watched a lightning storm at sea. We don’t really get spectacular lightening in NZ anyway. 14. Taught yourself an art from scratch. Hmm, I’d love to be one of those people… but I suspect I’m just not

15. Adopted a child. I really would love to do this…. after I give it a go myself. If I marry my current boy this could be a convenient way to get out of having too many babies in my late 30s but still give him the big family he wants.

16. Had food poisoning. Mild bouts – yes, severe luckily no.

17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty – New York is totally on my list of things to do and of course you’d have to go to the Statue.

18. Grown your own vegetables. Yes! My tomatoes are almost ready to eat and I have tons of fresh lettuce and spinach too at the moment.

19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France. Will have to plan a trip to Paris in the tourism low season and go!

20. Slept on an overnight train. But I have slept on overnight buses. Oh the joy.

21. Had a pillow fight. Only with my brother and probably over the TV remote or something

 22. Hitch hiked. No, but I did pick up some lovely Belgian boys once driving down the country which worked out really well.

23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill. I prefer to call it a mental health day. And yes.

24. Built a snow fort. Have only actually seen snow close up a few times and probably only once seen enough to do anything in it. I did a snow angel instead as I’d always wanted to. I was 27.

25. Held a lamb. Many a time! I used to have them as pets.

26. Gone skinny dipping. Yes

 27. Run a Marathon. Don’t really think my knees are up to it, would rather do a triathlon.

28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice. Was going to go to Venice for a week when I lived in London but chickened out as I was going by myself. Probably more romantic with someone else anyway.

29. Seen a total eclipse. Don’t think so…..

30. Watched a sunrise or sunset. Both many times….

 31. Hit a home run. Hahaha. No and it’s not likely I ever will

32. Been on a cruise. Would like to though, as long as it called at interesting ports and wasn’t full of old people.

33. Seen Niagara Falls in person. That would be cool.

34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors. Well I lived in England for a year and went to Liverpool where my granddad was born so I guess I’ve seen some of my roots.

35. Seen an Amish community. No, would be rather interesting though.

36. Taught yourself a new language. I took a few Spanish lessons but I need to do more, especially if I move to South Florida!

37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied. I’d like to be more than satisfied and have the freedom to be generous to needs around me.

38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person. I’d like to see this.

39. Gone rock climbing. Only abseiling. Should someone with a brain injury tempt fate futher? Not sure about that!

40. Seen Michelangelo’s David. Looks like I need to get back to Europe!

41. Sung karaoke. Yes, I have done Sing Star as well which is huge for me as I usually was way too shy to sing in front of others.

42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt. – I haven’t but I was born in Rotorua in NZ which is full of thermal activity and has many geysers. I think probably I’m happy with just seeing those.

43. Bought a stranger a meal in a restaurant. I need to do this! Cool idea!

44. Visited Africa. Would love to! I’m a wimp though and very scared of the bugs and other nasties. Would love to do a safari in South Africa and explore places like Soweto and other Apartheid significant areas.

45. Walked on a beach by moonlight. Many a time, luckily I live on an Island and we have a beach house that is about 5 minutes walk from the beach.

46. Been transported in an ambulance. Yes! A year ago I slammed my door shut and caught my thumb in it (yes I am truly stupid) and it flippin hurt a lot! But in my wisdom I thought it best to continue on with my day and jumped straight in my car and started driving. I got about 10 minutes down the motorway and I felt myself starting to faint (my thumb was really, really hurting by this point) and so luckily I managed to get off as there was an exit right there and I pulled into a random strangers house stumbled out of the car and muttered something about “slammed…. door… faint….” before I collapsed. Luckily lying down helped and I started feeling better but they called me an ambulance and the dispatch people got the message wrong and they thought I was still stuck in a door so it arrived with the sirens blaring! Very embarrassing, but it was sort of fun to ride in one to hospital! 47. Had your portrait painted. Probably at school someone drew or painted me in art class. 48. Gone deep sea fishing. I’m not sure I want to do this. Maybe if I had the opportunity.

49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person. – again need to plan that trip to Europe.

50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris. More to do!

 51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling. I think I’d like to try snorkelling, too scared of scuba.

52. Kissed in the rain. Don’t think so….

53. Played in the mud. Yes! I grew up in the country

54. Gone to a drive-in theater. We don’t have those in NZ, but they sound fun.

55. Been in a movie. No, despite living in Wellington and half my friends have been extras in Lord of the Rings or King Kong.

56. Visited the Great Wall of China. If I make it to China one day I would go

57. Started a business. Hmm, I might just be doing this right now! Well, my boy is but I’m doing so much work on it I think I might be too.

 58. Taken a martial arts class. Yeah, cos I’d like to prove how unco I am in public

59. Visited Russia. St Petersburg sounds amazing.

60. Served at a soup kitchen. I should one of these days though

61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies Yes – every year – well they were Girl Guide biscuits, but it’s the same thing!

62. Gone whale watching. In Kaikoura on NZ’s South Island. Was amazing as we saw about 8 whales, including two together which almost never happens.

 63. Gotten flowers for no reason. I’m sure I have… I can’t remember a situation though.

64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma. Yes, haven’t done for a while due to my health issues, but I am an O – and donate to premature babies as there is some virus that 90% of the population have had and I haven’t. They love me so I do need to get well enough to be able to donate again.

65. Gone sky diving. Don’t think I want to . Having a father almost die from falling 10 metres (30 feet) is enough to make me not want to experience free falling. 66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp. Wow, I need to plan my trip back to Europe!

67. Bounced a check. Yes, I don’t have a cheque book and haven’t had one for about 5 years (they’re so last century) but as a student I skated close to the line on many occasions.

68. Flown in a helicopter. Please can I oneday!

69. Saved a favorite childhood toy. Pinky, my Pink bunny is safely stored away. Oh and Bert (from Sesame St) my puppet too.

70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial. I guess if I become an American one day I’ll have to go there! Otherwise, I’ll go anyway as I’m sure it’s interesting.

71. Eaten Caviar. I guess you have to try it once in your life. 72. Pieced a quilt. I have a habit of not finishing craft projects so quilts just look way too easy to quit.

73. Stood in Times Square. New York is near the top of my list of places I want to visit

74. Toured the Everglades. It would be interesting to go there, I actually drove sort of past them in March last year on the way to the Keys. Though I think I’d be going alone as J has no interest in going there.

 75. Been fired from a job. You can’t get fired in New Zealand. But I have been terminated due to my accident, so I guess that’s pretty similar.

 76. Seen the Changing of the Guard in London. I never did this! I don’t think I really care though as I never got around to it in a year of living there.

77. Broken a bone. I think I broke my little toe once as it went black after I banged it pretty bad.

78. Been on a speeding motorcycle. Though I’m sure I will at some point as my boy has two bikes and one of them goes very fast. I have been on his Harley though which made me feel very cool. I’m so not cool obviously.

 79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person. Be great to go there!

80. Published a book. I sometimes think about it, but my writing is probably so bad it will never happen!

 81. Visited the Vatican. It would be pretty cool to do in Italy

 82. Bought a brand new car. One day…. I’m just excited about buying the very old car I’m buying currently and having a car at all!

83. Walked in Jerusalem. If they stop bombing each other.

 84. Had your picture in the newspaper. I think when I was in Band.

85. Read the entire Bible. I suspect this will be a lifelong goal.

 86. Visited the White House. Be very interesting. At least to look at it from the outside.

87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating. I caught eels when I was a kid and smoked them.

88. Had chickenpox. Yes, when I was fifteen. It was hell. I had spots EVERYWHERE. In my eyes, down my throat in lots of other unmentionable places. Never wish it on someone who’s been through puberty. Not fun at all. 89. Saved someone’s life. No. But I would if I needed to and I could.

90. Sat on a jury. I never want to, NZ is too small.

91. Met someone famous. Probably no one anyone else knows outside of NZ. Oh, I did meet Marian Keyes, the author once.

92. Joined a book club. Yes, my friend Natalie and I were the youngest by a few years but it was fun!

93. Lost a loved one. Grandparents only so far.

94. Had a baby. I’m not sure what is happening to me right now but it sems more and more appealing if I can manage it! Damn you biological clock.

95. Seen the Alamo in person. Don’t even know where it is really….

96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake. Again I don’t know where it is.

97. Been involved in a law suit. Thank you God that I’m a Kiwi. We just don’t do that sort of thing.

 98. Owned a cell phone. For ten years now!

99. Been stung by a bee. Yes, not for a long time and thankfully not by a wasp as my mum is deathly allergic and therefore I might be too..

 This feels like an American-centric list but it’s given me some travel ideas to work on!

Faith and works

14What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him? 15Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. 16If one of you says to him, “Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about his physical needs, what good is it? 17In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.

I have been meditating on this passage from James 2 in the last day and thinking more about my life in the last few months. Sometimes I’ve worried in the past that I’ve done too much as back in Wellington I was so busy at times and I know plenty of other Christians who were not in my church thought I needed to slow down a bit (I did) but I’m still convinced that actually being the hands and feet of Jesus in a teeny way is not a bad thing and that wasn’t what burnt me out. Poor health and too many meetings I think had far more of an impact!

As I have this lovely time to think and read a lot at the moment while I’m getting back to normal life I have also been pondering what is it that God wants me (us) to do and how am I going to find balance in the future when I’m back to normal. I think I read this passage in James from the perspective of the naked person who needs clothing mostly at the moment, I have definitely been in that position more than a few times in the last seven months and I think it wasn’t until I was listening to teaching on this passage yesterday that I really realised what a slap in the face a lot of Christian responses to sickness and tragedy are. It’s very hard to know what to say when someone says they’ll pray for you (which is always nice, if they actually do pray) but you’re thinking to yourself “I’m so exhausted I can barely look after myself… you could help with that” or something similar. The cynic in me thinks perhaps a lot less people actually pray than say they do as well and I try to make it a habit to pray straight away for the person, actually a better habit would be to pray there and then with the person for their need as I’ve really appreciated the people who have done that for me in the last little while, but I don’t always have the courage or the sense to do that.

I also wonder if that passage about separating the sheep from the goats may have a different meaning than what we think. Jesus said that what we do for the least of these we do as if to him, do you think that in the modern world and in particular the church we so often have our focus wrong? Jesus’ focus so much was on the broken, the hurting, the sick, the sinners (though aren’t we all that)  and I guess both individually and collectively we should also have the same focus. Heading forward I am going to try to demonstrate both faith and works – not be the interfering, eldest child with control issues too much (yep, I know I can be that person so quickly it’s not funny) but make sure I serve others  and meet their needs if I can, as well as demonstrating faith and praying. I am loving having this time out to think and read and listen, but it’s also very challenging as well and I am determined to be changed for the better which is the hard part.

New week, new goals

It’s back to reality for me now (sort of) after a month of terrible routines, eating a bit of bad food (though I was actually pretty restrained), not going to bed and getting up at normal times and not doing any work on the business. My OT met with me with the obvious ulterior motive of kicking my butt (they think they’re being subtle but you know) and the reality was her ideas were pretty much the same as mine anyway. I’m also coping with life as it is pretty well actually which is fantastic so I need to start pushing myself further.

So this morning I got up at 6am – I’m an early bird naturally so I love it if I wake up early and went for a walk and then came back and did an hour or so of work on the business before my brain fried. I think it may have been more to do with exercising on an empty stomach and the content of what I was reading but I will try to get back to it later. I’m now in the zone of pushing myself harder and finding out when I have the issues. I’m also meant to be stopping my afternoon sleep which I’m not so sure I’m happy about. The 20 minute power nap is a good thing, but the reality is when I’m working I won’t be able to do it necessarily (though I’m praying for a workplace with a sick bay).

Life for me at the moment is about planning, breaking things down into small goals and having structure and I think it’s a good thing. Though I’m feeling a bit frustrated now that my brain isn’t working very well and I don’t think I can do the three hours of work I wanted to do, I’m going to give it a go tomorrow and be proud that I was up, dressed and doing things so much earlier today than before. I’m determined to do well at this planning and working from home thing before I go back into fulltime employment as I’m actually really keen to think about working from home in the future and I know that being organised and disciplined will be key.

Other goals for the week – go for a few small jogs, swim at the pool and try to start reading a more serious book (I’m worried my reading skills are going to drop away completely).